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someone needs to tell me why i continue to watch supernatural when it fills me with even more rage than heroes does. like, every other word that comes out of dean's mouth. like, blah blah blah )


i've taken to yelling at co-journaller in all caps whenever i think about it, which is often, I APPRECIATE YOU BEING PATIENT WITH ME. because it is, in fact, that messed up when you actually sit back and consider it.

american tv, why are you continuing to fail me!

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cm: how are we going to post this new fic?
   "like the older fic, only slightly different!"
me: "uh, i wasn't quite done feeling spiteful about this yet. inspired by the latest ep, this one has more punching, too!"
cm: hahaha

We are so sorry.

to see us once beautiful and brave
peter/sylar, hard r, 3500 words, warnings for potentially disturbing imagery and violence, spoilers for "the wall" // archive link

perhaps all the dragons of our lives are princesses who are only waiting )
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So, I asked co-journaller, who does not actually feel like owning up to kink meme fic hey, whether she'd post at least some of it and then we picked three and here they are. Uh, there are five more, one of which has been moved to the ahaha beta queue (or, works in "progress"), one of which has been guessed by at least one person and one of which should be really, really easy. Uh.

Also, someone please fill that Declan/Nathan prompt.

rpf, crossover, rpf crossover; all by cm )
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for [ profile] mimesh's mindfuck prompt over at the gimme prompts, i guess? post: "Peter wreaking havoc and stomping around in Sylar's brain" - only it's not so much with the stomping and more with the, well. both more and less crack than one could reasonably expect. also, there can be only one pairing. (spoilers for the most recent ep.) ETA: AO3 link with proper headings and dub-con mindfuck warning and whatnot

we're alright in the back of our minds )
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me: wow dude srsly i want this vid now
cm: claire's sad little crying face when sylar attacks her the first time
me: it's a really long song though
   oh my god yes
   shit he killed elle i'd entirely forgotten
cm: yes, yes he did
   he tried to kill her once and she exploded?
   and then succeeded the second time
me: my god dude you could probably find three minutes just of SYLAR assaulting various blondes
cm: yes you probably could
me: oh my god meredith and doyle. AHAHAHA THIS SHOW OMG.
cm: haha
   doyle making sandra shoot claire
me: okay, how much are we willing to pay?

Um, we haven't entirely decided yet? But if anyone wants to make a vid showcasing The Blondes of Heroes being assaulted/terrorized/metaphor-raped/killed off prettily/NON-CON-KISSED* and set it to She Wants Revenge's Tear You Apart, we'd actually give you money! Or to charity or something. THERE'D BE A LOT OF FOOTAGE TO WORK WITH WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU KRING.

(* This is apparently a Thing now. Tell us more about your rape fantasies, writer boys. ::chinhands::)

Also if you like Sylar I'm sekritly judging you.
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1. sometimes i read metafandom links and all i can think about the OP is "wow you're a fucking idiot", and then i'm grateful i never participate in meta, because that's kind of rude. but truly, some people.

2. did you know that adrian pasdar is five-ten and a hundred and seventy five pounds? well now you know. maybe i suggest some exercise and a better diet (alcohol, for example, is fattening if consumed in large quantities), mr. pasdar? perhaps while you're doing community service and/or in prison or whatever, because really now. and that is all i actually have to say about that.

3. once in a while (by that i mean often), i watch this video, and in my head, i vid nathan/peter to it. my lack of video making skills is the only reason i do not terrorize everyone with my shitty interpretation of the end of their relationship. be grateful.

4. american idol this year, thus far: the grossness that is katy perry contrasted with the darling toothiness of avril lavigne! plus neil patrick harris who has a personality and also that jonas brother who um, sadly doesn't but is pretty at least. oh and i still adore you, posh spice. in addition to leukemia! ex-gang members! tourette's syndrome! actual kids with actual mental diseases that require treatment/medication! poverty-stricken small-towners! that one girl who apparently almost died from an asthma attack! so many people have such sad stories and a dream for the great marketing machine driving the show to exploit. lovely.

5. hey, i answered a meme at some point by the gorgeous [ profile] bossymarmalade, and apparently in response i'm supposed to offer ten ficlets of any fandom to the first ten people that respond. i do not feel that this is fair, because why should i give when i can get. hey, first ten people to respond to this post, write me fic, please. or you could ask for it, if you insist. well, minus one, because i am supposed to write "dirty bathroom blowjob peter/nathan vampire porn outtake" for co-journaller. in that vague sort of someday i will get to it, i will, way, i will.

6. being human > heroes, but is equally depressing and sad. perhaps we shall watch glee instead. should we watch glee instead?

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1) caprica tonight - anyone know if it's the same episode that was shown/leaked a while ago or is this an entirely new episode?

2) co-journaller and i re-watched episodes one and two of heroes. spent three hours discussing why it is peter is a, we're assuming, RN, and yet never behaves as if he has any training whatsoever outside of the hospital. like, oh my god my brother just got shot i know i'll chase after the shooter instead of trying to save his life like i must have at least some experience in dealing with medical emergencies. and how someone barely six months out of nursing school gets to be a hospice care worker in the first place without any other experience. oh heroes writers, what is going on here?

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you have our ruins and records, by mumblemutter (cm+A.)
pg-13ish, peter/nathan, I am Become Death Verse, and spoilers for up to there | ao3 link
pretty much what it says on the tin. peter in the obligatory IABD fic verse, being uh, peterish. and also there's petrellicest. and micah. not really an AU.

our destruction as a species was accidental )
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you have our ruins and records, by mumblemutter (cm+A.)
pg-13ish, peter/nathan, I am Become Death Verse, and spoilers for up to there | ao3 link
pretty much what it says on the tin. peter in the obligatory IABD verse fic, being uh, peterish. and also there's petrellicest. and micah. not really an AU.

but they won't tell you what we were like )
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Nathan Petrelli Memorial Kink Meme you guys. if you can guess which ones i wrote (other than the one that is patently obvious!) you get - well not much, actually. the knowledge that you've entertained me for a while? a ficlet of choice?

this is like my favorite vid of all time. it's jim and bobbi from profit. there needs to be more profit vids, come on.

there was a vid on youtube, set to sarah brightman's Eden, that chronicled peter and nathan's relationship in volume three. i believe it got taken down for copyright infringment, which sucks! i don't suppose anyone has a copy, no? no i didn't think so.

american idol has started again! it is simultaneously the best and worst american (well, actually it's worldwide now right?) tv show ever, and oh how i love it so. this year: more pop and r&b, less white boys singing "edgy" music, please and thank you, good night.

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in heroes news, um...what's this episode called again? )
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there is new heroes tonight y/y?

i don't know if i want to watch!


besides claire. and peter. and uh...the rest of the cast.

okay pretty and above the age of thirty-two. there we go.

ahaha co-journaller and i just watched a milo movie called Dirty Deeds. it's like the worst movie in the entire world, and milo didn't even have the decency to have good hair.

also he is a year older than zoe saldana, in case you were wondering. ETA: this is important because at some point he meets her and she calls him "kid." because he is eighteen in the movie. and she is...not. ha!

(also that was just about the only, the ONLY worthwhile scene in the entire movie.)

i want zoe and milo to make out on the set of Dirty Deeds because they're so inwardly horrified to be a part of that production they decide the only reasonable course of action is to get as drunk as they possibly can get in milo's trailer. and then of course the drinking leads to the making out, because that's what pretty people do. they drink, and then they make out. for our own amusement!

all this is distracting, you guys, i really don't want to watch the episode.

*pokes listlessly at*

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(and your past is not a rosetta stone), by mumblemutter (cm+A.)
pg-13ish, peter/nathan, post the fifth stage, and spoilers up to there | ao3 link
peter goes batshit, here's how. (no, really. that's pretty much it. there are no nailguns involved, alas. except in spirit.)

note: the show ignores the rules of time travel sometimes. so did we.

back and back to the future )
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co-journaller and i just watched "it's coming" aka in which some months ago peter and nathan were all over each other like siamese twins and also some other stuff happened but i couldn't pay attention on account of how peter and nathan were all over each other like siamese twins. also peter says like, five words in the entire episode to his parents, and even that is just to shut his mom up "i'll take care of my brother and his grief, thanks". his entire being, otherwise, entirely focused on nathan. oh, nathan. didn't you miss that when it was gone? i like to think you did. i will shed one delicate emo tear now for the writers entirely fucking up your character and your relationship with peter.

i'd go on at length about hiro and ando in that hut "somewhere in africa" hahaha i mean really, not a single person went "that's a continent*" but anyway spirit walk that's actually a power or something? HOW DOES THAT EVEN WORK I DO NOT UNDERSTAND EXPLAIN IT TO ME PLEASE. or just you know, blather in my direction about peter and nathan and their epic love and how their father is so evil i don't even understand it these are your children, arthur!

*the continent thing is funny because when i was in germany some guy tried to pick me up at the hurricane festival, and when he asked me where i was from i said "singapore" and he couldn't hear me and i thought he'd asked me where singapore was so i said "asia" and he went "pfft that's a CONTINENT" and i weren't married i would probably have slept with him just for that. well that and he said he had pot, but ANYWAY seriously you guys, come on.

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i just read sylar/mohinder shapeshifting mpreg. i enjoyed it. clearly there is something wrong with me. there is something wrong with me, universe! i need your help!

i shall go search out more petrellicest now, to make myself feel better. if i can't find something i've not read yet.

hey, where's the fic where nathan and peter like, go on picnic lunches and cuddle and make out? they never get to be happy on the show. clearly they should get to cuddle and make out and smile a lot in fanfic! with the family that they're both stuck with, they certainly deserve it. maybe that's why nathan has divorced himself from his children, he doesn't want them to grow up in as toxic an atmosphere as his must have been. (sorry, we're halfway through v3 right now. apparently parents find it acceptable to experiment on their own children if they're Petrellis? no, it's really not! you don't get to do that! your own children, omg!...i get the feeling the writers really didn't think this through. i don't even understand.)

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season two of heroes is done! thoughts (and spoilers, case anyone still hasn't watched it):

so at one point i told co-journaller "hang-on i want to see how long it takes for peter to abandon adam for nathan" and her response was "less than a minute" which, yes, sounds about right. HELLO ADAM. GOODBYE ADAM MY BROTHER IS HERE NOW TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO. things to note: peter does not care that adam uses hiro's sword to kill people? nathan says jump, peter says, how high? dysfunctional you guys, dysfunctional. and yet, i still ship it.

also there was a lot of discussion on the time-travelling thing, and how heroes views it. uh, it got a little headachy after a while, but in the end i came to the conclusion that peter viewed it as, if the virus didn't get out, then the entire world would shift around caitlin because she isn't actually part of the time a year from now, and therefore she would live. i think? otherwise he basically just trapped her in an alt-verse that's no longer accessible because it's not the most-likely-to exist. okay cut because this got a bit long, sorry guys! )
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five lives of crime, by mumblemutter
pg-13ish, peter/nathan, AU

notes: this started as a petrellicest version of burnt money/plata quemada (excellent movie, everyone should watch!), but at some point there came a realization that it was never going to be completed, and so what you get is a collection of AU sketches instead, where peter and nathan are criminal-type people doing criminal-type things.

» If I had to explain all I thought while I was inside, it'd take the same time I was locked away.


bonus outtake from the dr. horrible-inspired one that didn't actually get written, but seemed an amusing idea at the time (sylar would have been captain hammer):

Their big Plan of course, is the Nakamura Time Machine, which unfortunately isn't so much a time machine right now as it is a means for transporting you, within a period of four to five hours, from the laboratory to the lobby of St John's Hospital. Always, unerringly, St John's hospital. They've even marked the spot it appears in with a big X, after an unfortunate incident with a patient who'd only come in complaining of ulcers. Peter once drove down from their mansion to the hospital and had to wait exactly four hours and thirty-five minutes for the machine to re-appear, so even as a means of transport, it was highly ineffective. He called Nathan, every twenty minutes, precisely, to let him know, "I'm still waiting. It still hasn't shown up. Big damned time machine."

Sometimes, Nathan wished that he had someone else as a brother instead. Even Sylar seemed preferable.

But only sometimes.
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co-journaller and i have started watching season two of heroes. claire is still the prettiest, tiniest button of adorable ever, they still screwed over DL, adam monroe STILL EXISTS OMG I'D FORGOTTEN THAT ENTIRE PLOTLINE EXISTED GO AWAY GAIJIN, maya and alejandro are still lovely, sylar has started to become annoying, MONICA!!! monica is adorable, as is micah. also molly has two daddies who love each other very much but fight sometimes because MATT PARKMAN YOU ARE KIND OF A DOUCHE. also ahahaha what is it with fathers on this show can someone please have a dad that's not an evil child torturer or absentee father who will mentally scar their children for life? other than sulu that is, and even him i would not give a father of the year award to.

i haven't even gotten around to NATHAN yet, who apparently deals with his brother's death by destroying his career and alienating his family. presumably the latter isn't just because he's an alcoholic, but because he moved into peter's apartment and goes around making little shrines collages of peter photographs. i understand there's grieving, nathan. but, borderline creepy, don't you think? no scratch the borderline omg.

and then there's peter, who, in losing his memory, apparently forgot his entire personality as well, and, as co-journaller says, is played by milo as an entirely different person. which isn't a bad thing necessarily, but oh i do miss season one peter with the emo bangs and the addiction to nathan's cock big, wide eyes constantly on the verge of tears. COME BACK, SEASON ONE PETER.

no wonder most of the petrellicest vids are heavily season one based though. they kept them apart!!! after that! bastards!

eta: also i was reading TWOP recaps and the boards, from season three to season four did nathan actually disown peter? NATHAN WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU RETURN YOUR BROTHER'S CALLS OMG. no wonder he took so much joy in nailgunning your balls to a plank, i'm sure it wasn't just because it was sylar's body.

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okay yuletide uploading is open! and we're almost done uploading, save for some editing snafus. \o/

spending my spare time watching profit and reading heroes fic. i've branched out from nathan/peter to uh...random stuff that doesn't include sylar (although i'm okay with zach/anyone). i enjoy being in a fandom where there's actually fic if you go looking for it. interpol was a dry, dry place with some really good stories only i'd read them all.

i had this post to make about peter petrelli, and i deleted it at some point, and then i asked co-journaller to find any and all heroes posts we'd made the past three years ago. uh, there weren't many. and every single one of them involved one or both of us bitching about race and gender in the heroes verse (i hated hiro for being a stereotype of the sexless japanese man, and i remember that now! and my issues with the simone thing. and the isaac thing. and the DL thing.) i made no posts at all about peter or nathan.

but anyway, ANYWAY. peter/jim profit? totally effed up or TOTALLY EFFED UP. how long before jim entirely destroys peter and then in retaliation peter goes after him with a nail gun? i feel, not long!

co-journaller: let's write fic in which peter teaches him how to love
co-journaller: through the power of caring
me: you can't teach a PSYCHOPATH to love
co-journaller: peter: LET ME TRY
me: peter: it worked on my brother!
me: nathan: um
co-journaller: it would essentially be fanon peter/sylar
co-journaller: only actually hot

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are Heroes webepisodes/web comics considered canon? i don't watch them or read them, for various reasons, one of which is that until recently i had no idea there were such things as heroes webepisodes and comics. ur, i'm really an girl and whatever's there is just about all i know, most of the time. should i be? the webepisodes aren't available in my country anyway - what am i missing out? i guess i could hunt them down if i tried and they were worth it. someone, somewhere on the internet surely has put them up. i know you won't fail me, internet!


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